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A Day on the Green
Disclaimer: :uncontrollable sobbing: They don't belong to me!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Warnings: Shounen ai, 1x2; 3x4, severe Relena bashing towards the end.
"Come on!", Quatre pleaded with his companions as he stood in front of an entrance way waiting for the other pilots to make it through the rest of the parking lot.
"Look Quatre, I don't know if this is such a good idea.", the American pilot said as he and the others kept themselves a good distance away from the blonde boy.
"What are you talking about? This is a great way to relax!"
"Quatre, don't you think that there are other things....", Trowa began but stopped as Quatre approached him and took his hand.
"Don't worry about it if you've never played before. It's really not that hard." Trowa looked down at the other boy uncertainly. "Now come on!" The smaller boy dragged the taller boy off by the hand.
Duo sighed," Well, I guess we can't leave Trowa alone in there."
"Why not?", Wufei scowled. The mere thought of what Quatre had planned for them that day made him cringe.
"What do you say Heero?", the braided pilot asked brushing off the Chinese boy's comment.
Heero glanced at the entrance where Quatre and Trowa could no longer be seen. "I say that if we can get out of here without being seen, we go for it." The three remaining pilots all glanced at each other briefly before turning to run.
"Are you guys coming?", the soft voice rang thru the air, stopping Heero, Duo, and Wufei in their tracks.
Duo sighed while Wufei huffed and Heero made a face like he was ready to kill something.
******
Heero, Duo, Wufei and Trowa all stood on the green, none looking too pleased, fully equipped with everything needed to play a game of golf.
Quatre stood in front of them explaining the rules of the game. His voice became a blur to the others, as even Heero had trouble trying to retain all the information coming from the boy.
"So you see, it's really not all that difficult." , the Arabian pilot concluded not noticing the almost dumbfounded looks on his companion's faces, "So who wants to go first?"
The other four pilots cringed at the question. Duo slowly began to step to the side, making his way behind Heero to hide himself. Heero then tried to move the opposite way in order to uncover his braided friend. This routine soon turned into a scramble between the two boys, both yelling and screaming at the other to cut it out. (Well... Heero was yelling and screaming by his standards.)
Quatre sweatdropped looking at the two, then sighed and turned to the Heavyarms pilot," Why don't you go Trowa?"
"I don't think so."
" Oh come on! Don't be embarrassed. None of you have ever played, so you're all in the same boat." The blonde boy looked at his partner hopefully with soft blue eyes.
Trowa sighed and stepped forward, he never could resist those eyes. He stood by the ball that Quatre had placed on the tee and stared at it for a few seconds before glancing back at Duo, who was now pinned to the ground by Heero, then ay Wufei who just shrugged. He took a deep breath and began to mutter to himself, closing his eyes.
The other teenagers turned their attention to Trowa, all attempting to make out what was being said. They all leaned in closer, Trowa completely oblivious, and all raised an eyebrow when at last they could hear, "Be the ball, be the ball."
The staring in disbelief continued.
Trowa opened his eyes and instantly drew back and hit the ball, sending it across the green. The sudden movement caught the others off guard causing them all to jump backwards. Wufei bumping into Heero who then fell back on top of Duo who landed on the ground with a sharp thud.
"Itai!!!! Heero get off!!!!", the American yelled. The Japanese boy scowled and pushed himself up off of Duo, who then sat up rubbing his back.
"Okay, Who's next?" The three remaining pilots grumbled at the cheerful voice.
******
"I do NOT believe you got a hole in one your first try Trowa!", Duo said bitterly as they made they're way towards the second hole. "I think you cheated."
"I did not!", Trowa exclaimed, defending himself in a very out of character sort of way.
"HA!", Wufei said inviting himself into the conversation, "You're just jealous Maxwell, because he actually did it correctly."
"Hey! Anyone can hit the ball forward. It takes talent to hit it backwards."
Wufei opened his mouth to retaliate but was briskly cut off.
"At least he managed to hit the ball." , Heero stated glaring at the Chinese pilot.
"Yeah, well, at least I didn't send it out into outer space! Unlike someone we know." , Wufei glared back at the Japanese boy. Sparks began to bounce between them.
The Sandrock pilot bit his lip, uncomfortable with the situation, "You guys, please don't fight!" , he pleaded, but the three boys continued to glare and growl at each other. Quatre turned to his green eyed friend, "Trowa can't you do something?"
"Nope. They all deserve it."
Quatre sighed. Maybe this wasn't the best way to relax.
******
"INJUSTICE!!!!!!!!", Wufei hollered as he flung his golf club to the ground after about his tenth attempt at hitting the ball. He stormed away from the tee, ignoring a hysterical Duo who was rolling around on the ground laughing so hard that he was at the point of tears.
Heero smirked, amused by the Chinese boy's difficulty.
Quatre sighed, yet again, as he observed the others. Trowa placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder.
"Don't worry Little one, this day hasn't been a total loss."
"Huh?", the blonde boy looked up confused as Trowa walked over to the tee, set up the ball, and after a few moments of, "Be the ball." , hit it with ease.
Wufei snorted, "Show off." Duo and Heero nodded in agreement.
******
"HE CHEATS!!!!", Duo exclaimed as he and the others stared down at the hole where Trowa's ball comfortably sat.
******
"Okay Heero", Quatre began as the dark haired boy stood by the tee, "You've still been hitting it too hard, and I can't afford to loose anymore golf balls, so just try to hit it lightly."
Heero grumbled, "Ninmu ryoukai." He grabbed a club and approached the tee. He stared at the ball intently and slowly brought the golf club back and swung.
The ball went about two feet.
The other teenagers sweatdropped. Quatre bit his lip not knowing what to say. Heero stood perfectly still, most likely trying to control his temper.
"Hey Heero, don't worry about it.", Duo said as he (bravely) approached the dark haired boy, "I'll show you how to do it."
"Uh....Duo....", Quatre began, "Don't you think you should call it quits after what happened last time?"
"Yeah Maxwell, that golf cart looked pretty expensive."
"Shows how much you know Wu-man." Wufei fumed at the use of the name Duo had so kindly adopted for him. "Besides, I didn't break anything that couldn't be fixed."
"There's a golf ball lodged in the motor Duo.", Trowa pointed out.
"I'm not going to make the same mistake twice." The American grabbed a club and put a ball on the tee, "I'm pretty sure I've got the hang of it now."
"Duo....", Heero warned.
"Don't worry!" With that, Duo swung and sent the ball flying. The ball cut thru the air, but veered off to the left, bounced off a tree and soared off to the right and ricocheted between a few trees as the pilots followed with their eyes. The ball suddenly flew back to the left and hit another tree. "Uh......", Duo's eyes went wide as the ball started to come right at him. He ducks just before the ball goes whizzing by. A sharp 'clucknk' suddenly sounded behind him, followed by what sounded like it hitting the ground.
Duo slowly stood up and turned to see what had stopped his out of control ball.
"Ooohhh Shit." The braided boy began to slowly back up.
"Duo......", Heero rubbed the large, red welt on his forehead, "Omae o korusu."
"Hey man......", Duo laughed nervously, "I didn't do it on purpose.", he continued to back up, "You know that .......right?"
"Heero, please don't do anything rash.", Quatre said as he shuffled over closer to Trowa.
"Eep!", Duo turned on his heels and quickly fled as Heero suddenly charged towards him. The others watched as little super-deformed versions of their companions ran off towards the woods at the edge of the green, Duo yelling for help while begging for forgiveness at the same time.
Wufei stepped forward trying to get a better view. "Go Yuy! Give that bastard what he deserves!", the Shenlong pilot suddenly yelled taking Trowa and Quatre completely by surprise. "Make him sorry for all the humiliation he's ever caused anyone!!" As he said this a loud 'thud' was heard from where Heero and Duo had disappeared to, soon followed by a very long, "Itai....!!!"
Wufei smirked, "Ha. Justice is served!!"
******
Duo rubbed his head as they approached the eighteenth hole. Again Trowa completed his turn with a perfect stroke, then smiled at Quatre who was happy to know that at least one of his friends was benefiting from the day.
Wufei cursed as, once again, he failed to even make contact with the ball. He held the club in both hands and began bending it in half as he fumed with anger. Finally the club snapped and he tossed it to the ground mumbling words of injustice.
It was times like this that Quatre was glad he was rich.
Duo, who had been banned from ever playing golf again, stood off to the side pouting.
Leaving Heero as the last one to go.
He approached the tee, wondering why he was even attempting. After placing the ball on the tee, he stood there for a few moments calculating which would hurt his pride more, screwing up (yet again), or giving up.
Deciding that he wasn't a quitter, he prepared to completely embarrass himself one last time.
Heero brought the club back and swung.
"Heeeeerrrrooooooo.......!!"
The familiar, yet annoying voice rang thru the air causing the pilots to cringe.
Heero, who had been mid-stroke, lost his gripe allowing the club to go flying out of his hands.
The sound of aluminum meeting bone echoed thru the green.
Relena Peacecraft lay on the ground about twenty meters away. A golf club lodged in her skull.
The five boys just starred for a few moments.
"Oh dear....", the soft voice of the Arabian broke the silence. Trowa stood by him remaining as quiet as always.
Wufei crossed his arms over his chest. "Onna no baka.", he muttered in disgust.
A smile spread across Duo's face. "Ha!", he slapped the stone faced pilot on the back, "So you finally got the balls to kill her."
Heero's fist connected with Duo's face.
A golden haired girl wearing a white tank top and jeans randomly 'popped' into the story behind Heero.
"Damnit Heero!!", she smacked him up side the head, "That was not the appropriate response!!" With that she disappeared with another 'pop'.
"How did she get into this story?", the braided pilot asked as he rubbed his face.
Everyone else just shrugged.
"She's right though.", Duo pointed out, "That wasn't the correct response." Heero just shrugged. "But I forgive you!" A huge grin spread across the heart shaped face.
"Shouldn't we do something about Miss Relena?", Quatre asked looking over at the body of the Queen of the World.
"What? She's dead.", Wufei inquired.
"Um......she's not quite dead.", said a random person who happened to walk by the scene.
Heero grabbed his gun (from where ever he keeps it.) and fired a single shot.
"Oh......she's dead now." The random person looked confused.
"Good job Heero!". Duo stood next to the Wing pilot awed.
"Mr. Trowa!" They all turned to see a young boy running up to them. "Mr. Trowa!" The teen being spoken to suddenly nervous as the boy stopped in front of him. "Mr. , I put the ball in the eighteenth hole just like all the others. Do I get paid now?"
Trowa sweatdropped, and Quatre sighed in disappointment as Heero and Wufei gave death glares. Duo threw his arms up in the air.
"I KNEW he was cheating!!"
~owari~
G-girl~ Ten points if you got the Monty Python reference at the end!!!!!!
Wufei~ Onna!! You did it again!!!!!!!
G-girl~ Gomen. But you just make it soooooo easy to tease you.
Heero~ You weren't the only one Chang.
Wufei~ Yes, but she loves you. (G-girl grins)
Duo~ And me!! She loves me too!!!!
G-girl~ I love you all!! I can't help it that this story drew it's humor from your humiliation! Anyway, I hope everyone enjoyed reading!! ^.~
P.S.- The "clucknk" sound came from my friend Lady Chang Wufei. (she wanted credit.)